WHY DON'T YOU JUST DROP DEAD

10:44pm: FUCK THAT NOISE.
okay. so. people like to hack my livejournal.
and be rude as fuck.
therefore...
Add my new livejournal.
Or, check your friends list, and accept me.

thank you.
and, sorry if you had to read that post.
it was fucking ridiculous.
fuck people man, serious.

6:36am: i like my coffee black just like my metal
I love how 6 am feels.
It's refreshing.
The air is cold, and crisp.
And the clouds look amazing.
not sleeping makes me feel so much better.
I love autumn mornings.

11:14am: the last couple weeks.\month.
i've chilled amazing fucking people. uh-may-zing.
i've had the best times ever.
and i've made the best friends ever.
these people are the reason i smile.
these kids make moment memorable.

friday: Rebecca, Samm, Cassie, Brandon and I hung out, rented American haunting.
and it was terrible. but funny. then it started to rain, so Cass, Rebbeca and I ran outside in bras and pants
and ran up and down my street in the rain, while Samm ate KD out of the pot on my porch, and Brandon sat on myspace. lol.
We sat in a huge puddle, until it got warm. and we kind of got creeped out. BEST LIGHTENING EVER.
Rebecca and I looked like M374L hookers, and Cassie looked fine. lol.
AMAZING NIGHT.

Saturday: showww. it was dece. saw a shit load of people. it was sick. chilled with my boy<3, Samm, Bostin, Rebecca, Brandon, Phil, Madelen, Tellie, April Kristi, fuck. a lot of people. lol. and then Samm and I came home, and slept. lol.

i love these kids like hell. fuccccccck <3

8:48pm: i guess i'll just chill with knowing that when i grow up, i'll be exactly where i am now.
I'll never go off, and become something amazing.
I'm average... Mediocre.
I'm not intellegent, nor am I talented.
I have no special skills.
Writing won't get me anywhere.
Cutting hair won't either.
Drawing.. doesn't get you anywhere until you're dead.
I'm going to end up some fat bitch,
with fat kids who hate me, and a broke fat husband who fucks my fat friends while i'm at water arobics trying to look good for him.
and fat friends who will only use me for my fridge. and it's going to be like that for the rest of my life.
I'm going no where, and it's time i accepted that.

i'm almost done highschool. (maybe, hopefully).
2 more years.
She can't even wait two more years.
Christmas. Fucking christmas. I'll be out.
and her life will be perfect.


fmlfmlfmlfmlfmlfmlfmlfmflmflmflFML.

11:19pm: MY MSN GOT FUCKED UP.
PLEASE ADD
jovimarie_@hotmail.com.

PLLEEAASSSEEE <3

4:31pm: i miss you.



ps, heres the link for pictures from merkers party.
PIRATES
http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v424/halfthestruggle/PIRATES/

10:35am: last night was such a good night.
mhm.
minus the fact that my make up went missing.
and there was some akwardness.
it was a really good night.
i love you all.
too much.
<3

7:44pm: matthew good band.
on repeat.
for 4 days.
i hate this so much.


fuck my life.

8:49pm: it feels like im 5 years old again.
i have no say in anything.
my opinion means nothing.
i am nothing.
i want to go away.

12:20am: life is sweet. yep.

minus that i miss how things used to be.
i miss the group.
but people grow up.
and they move on.
i guess these things just happen.

but, life is sweet.
'nuff said.

3:54pm: yesterday, was the most, amazing day of my whole life.

so, i met jared leto. (!!!!!!!) and he signed my stomach. (!!!!!!) and then, i realized it would just wash off, so they all signed my wallet.
30 seconds put on the best show, i've probably ever seen. it was fucking awsome.

hellogoodbye was so good, mmhm.

joan jett, amazing, obviously. lol.

lol gym class heros were good., haha

everything was just good.

i really wish my camera wasnt such a fucking peice of shit. lol.

2:18am: note to self; stop fucking up. start thinking things through. start giving a shit. fgt.

5:22am: warped is comming. i'm excited.

i'm just so fucking lost, with everything.
i just don't know what to feel, or say.
i just want school to start, so i can
have other things to focus on.
jesus fucking christ.

3:14am: i want a boy who..

6:48pm: stoked stoked stoked!
18 Visions
Adair
Against Me!
Aiden
Alexisonfire
Anti Hero
Anti-Flag
Armor For Sleep
Billy Talent
Bouncing Souls
Britt Black
Bullet for My Valentine
Cartel
Chiodos
Comeback Kid
Down to Earth Approach
Eight Fingers Down
Emanuel
Evaline
Everytime I Die
Ferus
Flash Bathory
From Autumn to Ashes
Fuscia
Gatsby's American Dream
Gogol Bordello
Greeley Estates
Gym Class Heroes
Halifax
He is Legend
Hellogoodbye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Helmet
Horse The Band
I Am The Avalanche
Ill Scarlett
Joan Jett and the Blackhearts
Less Than Jake
Moneen
Motion City Soundtrack
Mute Math
NOFX
Pistolita
Princess Riot
Protest the Hero
Race The Sun
Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
Rise Against
Saves The Day
Saves The Day (Acoustic)
Scary Kids Scaring Kids
Senses Fail
Senses Fail (Acoustic)
Septic Tank Disasters
Shiragirl
Side 67
Silverstein
So They Say
Strap-On Tools
Street Drum Corps
Stretch Arm strong
The Academy Is..
The Bled
The Casualties
The Early November
The Fully Down
The Lorrainas
The Pink Spiders
The Salads
The Smashup
The Sounds
The Sunstreak
The Vincent Black Shadow
Thursday
Valencia
Valient Thorr
We are the Fury
Wheels On The Bus
Zebrahead








SO MOTHER FUCKING STOKED!!!  UGH!! <3!!!!!

5:28pm: if i've ever done anything, said anything...anything, at all and it hurt you. read this.

8:56pm: i hate mood swings.
and i really wish i wasn't just one of like, the 6 girls you have a crush on.
and i wish i didn't knw that.








anyways.
i cut my hair.
no more mullet.
hi little girl hair.
mhm.

11:39am: i hate change.
i hate how people change.
i wish i could go back like..5 months.
when things were good, or at least better.
i really didn't worry about much then.
nothing important anyways.
there was next to no drama. ever.
now thats all it is.

ughhh i need new pants.
pretty bad.
mine are all destroyed.
i think rach has my only decent pair.
fuck my life i need a job.

i'm really sick of everything.
it's summer, i want it to be amazing.
this is like...my last summer where i
can seriously just fuck around and not
care.
like. next year, i'm gonna be in gr. 11.
aka, job, school. job. school. job. school.
money money money money money
and i'm going to save everything.
this summer is nothing.
but i want it to be everything.
i dont make sense. gah.

serious, i really fucking hate change.
and i hate changing.
i dont want to change.
at all.
i'm fine with how i am.
i mean, i may not lead the BEST lifestyle..
but what ever, fuck it.
i'm content.
so why the hell cant he be?
he's expecting too much, too soon.
gahhhhhhhhhhh. hah. lame-o.




fuck mother's boyfriends.
i think i seriously might kill him.


ugh.

12:09am: i think my head is going to explode.

yep.

1:00am: i'm..just really, really, really fucking happy.
ugh. sweet life.

8:24pm: so, my computers a douche.
and it shuts down, always.

i'm in a really. really bad mood.
i hate her. a lot.

12:43am: srsly. what the fuck do you think this is?
do you think it's okay to go out and get trashed on a monday night
when you have to get up and get your fucking daughter
to school tomorrow?
do you srsly think that you can still just go out
and do what ever the fuck you want?
GROW UP.
you're fucking 46 years old.
not 26. not 24. not anything.
GROW UP AND REALIZE YOU HAVE A FUCKING
FAMILY. YOU CANT JUST DROP US WHEN EVER
A FUCKING BOTTLE OPENS.
FUCK OFF. . UGH:@@#%@#^#$^

10:51am: sooo i got my septum done.
and it hurt like a fucking whore.
end

7:40pm: 10 things i hate about HER.
FIRST:she gets what ever she wants, when she wants, even when it's mine.
she's a spoiled little bitch.
she bitches and bitches and bitches or cries until she gets her goddamn way. i'm so fucking sick of her.
i wish she was old enough to punch in the face.

SECOND: fuck my family for putting up with her bullshit, and not giving a fuck about anyone else in the situation, only her. THNX.

THIRD: fuck how she wears my clothes, my accesories, and robs my room when im not home. fuck how she steals shit from me, and when i ask why she's wearing it, she freaks out to my mom and then i get yelled at for "not sharing" or "not being a nice sister"
well fuck that. she thinks im going to be nice when every second she does something to either A: get me in shit, or B: piss me off. well fuck her.

FOURTH:she's so fucking conceated, she thinks everything has to be done for her when ever she fucking wants. the fucking bitch won't even wipe her own ass. no lie.

FIFTH:she's an evil whore. she makes up bullshit lies to get me in shit. she also grabs crotches.. thus making her an evil whore.

SIXTH:she plans out everyone elses life so it works out for her, like... she'll ask if you can watch tv with her, you say, "i dont htink i'll have time tonight, but maybe when im done my art culminating [which is due tomorrow]" you then work all night on it.. while she waits in her bed refusing to sleep, then goes and cries to my mom when i say i wont be finished. i then get yelled at ..for "making promises i can't keep" when i NEVER promised, NOR did i fucking say i'd do it.

SEVENTH: EVERYONE TAKES HER GODDAMN SIDE. she could punch me in the face and only be told to keep her hands to herself, i tell her to fuck off because she's punching me..and i get yelled at for using vulgar words infront of her...when...she tells me to fuck off on a daily basis.. or calls her friends sluts..

EIGHTH: everyone thinks she's fucking perfect. does no one else see that she's a whiney self-centered rude little bitch?

NINTH: she thinks she's top shit, and if ou ask her to do ANYTHING she says no, but expects everyone to fucking wait on hand for what EVER she fucking wants.

TENTH: she destroys everything. she hurts people. she's a two-faced backstabbing cunt. she's only eight years old.. and she's perfectly willing to attempt to ruin your life. and she seriously wonders why all of the kids at school hate her.




fuck her

5:30pm: saturday, was soosososososo sick. lol. i loved it.
i love those girls.
:]

i'd post pictures.. but most are REALLY embarrasing hahahaha.
lol at being really high in a tent with a camera and a flashlight.
bahaha.
<3